After graduation Mary Anne went out
lookin' for a bright new world
Wanda looked all around this town
and all she found was Earl

“Y’uns’re gonna love it hyer I’m tellin ya!” the farmgirl specializing in pokemon husbandry told the gaggle of pokemon she’d accumulated over her last couple of months in the region. She’d been meaning to make a trip to the Friendship Fiesta for awhile now, but since none of her pokemon evolved through friendship she didn’t figure it was worth the trip until she had one that did. But there had been some tension she’d sensed among the ranks lately and she thought a good way to dispel some of it was good old fashioned bonding as a team at the friendliest place there was. Maybe they could find a nice feller for her vulpix Marian while they were here too - she’d never tell the wannabe mama such a thing to put pressure on her of course. But in truth Marian was the only one of her current lineup that wanted babies at the moment, so she’d have to look elsewhere to try to make a match if they were going to jump into it.

But that was only the side mission. The main quest was getting Q’s spirits raised, Elmer’s sour attitude fixed - he still was grumpy after the encounter with the alien that had long since been sent to the PC -, Jameson to do some growing up, and eugh Chanticleer could do with some exposure to grass and bug pokemon that didn’t end with him saying something offensive to them. She spotted a pretty little Cutiefly rolling around in some flowers nearby as they walked in and gestured for the fletchling to look at her, ”Now I want you to work on saying something nice to that little bug. Don’t you dare approach until you have something nice to say. I won’t have you picking fights for me with the other trainers just cause somebody didn’t raise you right!” she warned him, firm but fair.

Chanticleer clicked his beak, narrowing his eyes at the bee and concentrating hard on something nice. Something...nice. He thought maybe he had something and took a couple hops toward the flower bed, mustering up the ability to be nice to a type of pokemon he found revolting and subpar. It was hard to quell the desire to call it a six-legged freak of nature. Just as he opened his beak to speak the sudden smack of pink stumps against bulbous bodies drew the attention of him and every other member of the Holub team, including its trainer. Mila saw a pink haired girl, pretty enough she supposed in her fancy dress, shoving together two pokemon who were equally as pink. ”Well now that shit ain’t gonna fly!” she muttered to Marian and Elmer, motioning for the most mature of her team to follow her and instructing Q to keep an eye on Jameson who was having the time of his life biting the water spouting up from the fountain in the ground intermittently.

The trio approached the other three at the bench and Mila, unable to help herself, reached down to grab the wrist of the hand grabbing Two, gripping it hard enough to get her message across but not so hard as to leave a mark or hurt the woman, ”Howdy sugar! Jes wot n tarnation do ya thank yer doin with these baby pokemon?” she asked, her voice dripping with her mountain folk down home accent. ”Bless yer heart, ya ain’t tryna breed ‘em are ya?” she asked, hoping against hope that she would get a response in the negative and not the affirmative. Cause she just may have to kidnap the children and make a run for it if that was the case. And she was actually trying to force two female baby pokemon to fuck in the middle of the Friendship Fiesta. Could someone really be that dumb??

< Are you okay, babydoll? > Marian whispered to One while Elmer sidled up to Two, ready to give a wing to cry on if need be.

After graduation Mary Anne went out
lookin' for a bright new world
Wanda looked all around this town
and all she found was Earl

Chanticleer clicked his beak at the puffball of pollen, his birdy form of scoffing as he couldn’t help but to retort with, < Gotta be a real dumbo to pick a creepy crawly like you for a pokemon! > he winced, not because he felt bad or wrong for saying it - only because he knew there would be consequences for being caught letting his prejudice against bug types show through. Hopefully Mila hadn’t heard him since she was preoccupied with the dumbo in question right now.

Mila was as stupid with social cues and graces as Ellie seemed to be with breeding, so she didn’t realize the offense she’d caused by reaching ahold of the other girl. And didn’t take any offense to the way her gaze raked her up and down deliberately to put her ill at ease. She just put a hand on her hip, cocking it to one side as her weight shifted from one foot to the other, head tilting in confusion at how abrasive this girl was being. She was the one who had been in the wrong here...why was she acting like Mila was the villain??

Before the farmgirl could muster a word to shut her down, having flashbacks to schoolroom bullies before she’d been taken out to be homeschooled, it was like a switch was flipped on the cotton candy lady’s face. And she dipped into a sales pitch. Mila groaned and sank to the ground, folding her feet up under her to sit criss-crossed and look up at this girl. Was she serious? Mila glanced between One and Two as they spoke in turn. This had happened before…

Mila cleared her throat, lacing her fingers together and propping her chin on her knuckles, elbows braced on her denim clad knees, ”Alrighty soooo….y’er tellin me y’er tryin ta breed this un” she nodded to One ”And this un.” to Two, ”Now I’m tellin ya, ya can try all daggone day long and ain’t nothin gonna happen. Fer one, “ she held her fists up and mashed the two sides of her hands together to indicate they weren’t fitting, ”They ain’t compatible. Now I ain’t sayin they ain’t welcome to give it a go if that’s what they’re into but you don’t need to be forcin it to happen no matter if their parts match up or not. Either way these two ain’t gonna give ya no eggs. And besides that, they’re baby pokemon. Babies cain’t make babies.”

She scratched her cheek, her brows furrowing, ”Jes what kinda breeder are you anyway that you don’t know this basic stuff? Hell, even just an average person outta know two female babies cain’t breed…” Marian patted One on the puff on One's head sympathetically, trying not to set her trainer on fire with a bit of Ember right then and there. Elmer wasn’t as hands - er..wings - on with Two, seeing she had quite a bit more bite to her and wasn’t exactly seeking consolation. That igglybuff wanted blood…

After graduation Mary Anne went out
lookin' for a bright new world
Wanda looked all around this town
and all she found was Earl

Mila nodded at her question, ”Yeah, they’re both girls, alright. In fact, if you were to find a male iggly or jiggly or wiggly ya’d be purdy damn lucky! They’re mighty rare. That evolution chain is almost always girls. Ya’c’ld probably find some way to hook up with other breeders and see if anybody’s got a male in their egg group who could breed with them once they evolve - but even then, you need to make sure they’re comfortable with each other and the idea of breeding. You wouldn’t want someone coming up to you and jamming someone else against you and hoping for a baby to walk away with. That’s assault - and that’s what ya were doin just now, forcin them together!”

When she said she was new to it all Mila shrugged, ”I’m lucky, I was raised on a farm and my papaw was a breeder. He taught me everything I know - and even then I’m sure there’s stuff I’ll need ta learn still. So it’s definitely somethin ya should take yer time with. If ya’ve only had these little girls long enough to not know what was between their legs then it makes sense ya wouldn’t know the first thang about breedin.” she crossed her arms, her head tilting, ”And don’t rely on other people to send ya information or blame them fer yer ignorance. Ya can only blame yerself for yer shortcomins. If ya could manage to find your way hyer ya kin find yer way to a library.” Then she pursed her lips, concerned and filterless, ”Ya do know how ta read, right?” she was being genuine - she didn’t know how to be anything else - and her tone the entire time she’d been speaking wasn’t an insulting one. Just matter-of-fact and educational like she always was. Things just were what they were to her. She’d had a simple life up to this point, and never got caught up in the trappings of nuances of society and pot stirring or cat fights.

The Fletchling clicked his beak once more at the Cutiefly. He knew he wasn’t supposed to say those things, Mila had told him as much, but he couldn’t help it! His parents and their parents and their parents before them - they all had always said the same thing! Bugs were gross! Cause they were! Just look at that ugly thing all covered in flower jizzum for crying out loud! EW AND NOW IT WAS THROWING IT AT HIM. He squawked and gagged, zooming up into the air with his beak thrust up, striking her in her position above him. He wasn’t even sure if it was a move, he just hit her on his ascension. Natural consequences bug bitch!

Marian patted the Igglybuff again, trying not to laugh at what One had said, < Now that’s a little shallow sounding, when you put it that way, babydoll. Do you mean you knew she could provide for you and keep you safe...or so you thought anyway…> she tsked. Mila looked down at the two of them, especially when Two said they should kill her and opened her mouth to chastise the puffball on her trainers behalf - obviously Ellie couldn’t understand a lick of pokespeech or she was sure this situation wouldn’t have gotten this far - when strange sounds from behind them caught her attention. She turned to see Chanticleer flapping his wings in an attempt at flail and she screamed. ”That ain’t playin nice, ya little fucker!” turning on the heel of her boot and stomping over to what had turned into a battle in what was supposed to be a place of friendship.